Firestone’s Defense Mechanisms: The Fantasy Bond and Inner Critical Voice

Here is a 30 second video to explain the spectrum from highly defended or inward behaviors to a healthy social engagement system, (what Firestone calls “the Ethical Personality.”)

This class explains WHY people are more highly defended, it explains the two defense mechanisms that contribute to this and typical behaviors and worldview.

Below are slides from the presentation, contact HeidiCrocket at for payment:

This first slide above looks at the neurobiology model of how we exist on a spectrum from low to high integration, (as taught in this first class). This second class outlines a brilliant theory that explains what happens when people’s brains have impaired integration.

The above slides show the behaviors of someone more integrated vs. more defended. “Damage” is a word that Firestone uses to describe what Heidi would call impaired integration in the brain. What happens is through genetic or other internal reasons and/or poor external factors, the child’s brain stops looking to real, in-person connections (“lovefood”) to nourish itself and instead feeds off objects. What might have been excellent coping mechanisms when young, (a special blanket or doll,) can turn into an addiction to substance or object.

Ultimately, anything can be used by a less integrated brain to cause separation and feelings of isolation and loneliness, even objects or behaviors that appear as healthy coping mechanisms. If successful, these mechanisms reduce intimacy and connection.

In this theory we all have these two defense mechanisms, (an illusion of connection called the “fantasy bond,” and the inner critical voice, together referred to as the “squid,”) but the key is whether a person can set and accomplish goals. This shows us that our defense mechanisms are not as strong and are not preventing us from living the life we envision.

You would purchase this class if you want to understand why someone around you is a “difficult person,” (to begin to get a better understanding of the types of things they’re doing that are making it impossible for you to be in a living, connecting relationship with them). Also, if you are curious how you, too, possess these same mechanisms and what you can begin to do to weaken them. Every time you engage in certain behaviors described in this lecture, (stonewalling, withholding, seeing yourself as inferior or superior, etc.) that nourishes your “squid” and reinforces the mechanism, (what fires together wires together). Luckily because we all possess that prefrontal cortex or the “SELF-SYSTEM” in this theory, we can “think about thinking” and reprogram these mechanisms. First we must understand them.

Finally, even if you think that you want to grow and become a better person, one idea in this theory is that your mechanisms create a “psychological equilibrium” that aims very much to keep you at a certain level of integration and not go higher. Quote from one book:

This explains the psychological equilibrium a little bit:

Interested? Email HeidiCrockett at to make payment. You will then receive the video, “Firestone’s Defense Mechanisms: The Fantasy Bond and Inner Critical Voice” and a 2 page HANDOUT with core quotes explaining the theory and a reference chart listing inward and healthy functioning social engagement system behaviors.

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